Thursday, June 18, 2009

More on Montana

So far the difference between Montana and Utah is in that all of the churches in Utah have been replaced with Casinos and Liquor Stores. I'm not kidding when I tell you that there were 2 casinos and 2 liquor stores all on one block in Missoula. (Which incidentally has been our favorite place to stay...)
Our first day was in Missoula with zero machine repairs and mostly just driving around and enjoying the beautiful area. Monday night we were ready to list our home for sale and move by the end of the week. We both loved it, it was comfortable, beautiful, and we were sure we could easily get used to this.

Tuesday we drove to Hamilton and Helena. the drives were nice, the machines were easy to fix and still the state was beautiful. We actually talked to Regional Manager in the early afternoon and told him that the only thing we still had concerns about was our house and what to do with it. That was true.

We went to St. Helen's Cathedral (so beautiful!), and the capitol building and spend the night in Helena.

We got all excited on Wednesday because we were sent to Kalispell which meant we could drive by Flathead Lake (which is apparently the most beautiful place on the planet). So, we left early(ish) and headed North for 5.5 hours. Between the construction, my constant need to pee, and Josh's desire to stop at every single indian stuff gift store/museum we added about an hour and a half to the drive.

Somehow during that drive the magic was lost. We started to get nervous about long days and long drives. We started thinking about what it really means to leave Utah. We started to wonder if Montana was really the place for us. Yes, it's beautiful. Yes, it's a promotion. Yes, it would be good for us to be away. But really? Is this how we should spend our days (and nights)? Should we commit to this when there are so many unknowns?

That excited feeling we've been praying for (if it was right) was missing. It wasn't exciting, it was just work. It wasn't fun, it was just a long drive in the mountains (which we have in Utah too). It was just.....Montana.

So, here we are. Halfway through the week with 1 "getting here" day (which doesn't count), 1 great "I wanna move here tomorrow" day, and 1 "meh....let's just stay home where it's just as pretty and a lot less hassle" day.

Today it looks like there may be a 7 hour drive through the "ugly part of the state", which I think might break the tie in a bad way.

I'm still coming back to the same problem I always have when making big decisions. When we hit the lull, the "maybe this isn't it" feeling, is that the Spirit saying "run! run the other way!" or is that a "trial of our faith" or is that based completely on other factors (i.e. it's hotter, less rain, the hotels are getting worse, and the vacation is over and the work has begun)?

It's not like I think you shouldn't take a job if it doesn't feel like vacation every day - work is work - but if Josh is already stir crazy driving all day every day (and it's only been 3 days) is it reasonable to believe this is a job he would enjoy?

Yesterday for the first time since we found out about this opportunity I actually believed the line "nothing is decided yet, we may get up there and hate it" that I've been giving all the people who would miss us if we left (gramma's mostly).

No matter what happens I'm glad we came so we could make an educated decision. I just hate having to be responsible for that decision.....don't you think a grown-up should do it for me? Mommy? Are you out there?

1 comment:

  1. Still waiting for the final decision...

    It's so hard to be a grown up.


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