The best way

I call insurance companies for a living.

I listen to all kinds of hold music.

All day* long.

And I've learned that the best way to make the hold music stop, is to insert as many chips as possible into your mouth at once.

You're welcome.

*This is a big fat lie. I don't even come close to working all day long, much less spending it all on hold. So I suppose I should technically say "all hour long" but that just doesn't evoke as much pity, does it?

Backwards

Thomas likes to stand up while I hold one of his hands. Then he likes to grab my other hand and start walking backwards. 


He does not like to walk forwards. In fact I think he's scared of it. 


Utah and I are usually good friends (hand holding, skipping down the street together kinds of friends). Spring snowstorms happen to be one of my favorite things. But even I can admit that snow the week of memorial day is backwards. 


Since apparently holding hands with me makes you backwards, Utah and I will now break up and stop holding hands for the sake of everybody else in the state who is ready for summer. 


But don't you come whining to me when it's 90 degrees tomorrow, your power bills comes (and you have to get a second mortgage) and the pool still isn't open OK? You wanted summer, and I have a sneaking suspicion you're gonna get summer. 


(ew....)