This is why I don't answer the door

Josh is downstairs trying to convince the salesman that we don't need to buy their $2 coupons for oil changes.

Today I'm proud of him, he usually gets sucked into the sales pitch, but he may not let them make it past "can we come in and tell you about it" this time.

In the meantime, I'm just glad I made that deal about not answering the door for strangers, because I do not love them, they do not love me, and I NEVER have as much money as they want.

The rest of the weekend

Saturday afternoon we slept in our own bed (much better, thanks for asking).

Saturday afternoon (later) we prepared our food for the weekend. Tin Foil Dinners. Pasta salad for Sunday. Snacks for all the moments in between. 

Saturday evening we went to Santaquin. (Yes, CLEAR out to Santaquin) for a fire food party/game night at Tahnee's house. That's where we played games, ate fire food (minus toast-tites because who wants a toast-tite when you can have the Ward's yummy lava chocolatey goodness? nobody.) and hung out with work friends all night long. I got out my camera and took zero pictures, because Jessica was taking them so I didn't feel like I had to. I LOVE it when I'm off the hook!
Big news of the evening? Aundrea rocks at word games (surprise surprise) and I ate a bite of deer hot dog. Wasn't as bad as you think it was. Actually kinda good. Maybe I've been craving the rest of that deer hotdog ever since. But, I have some pride and I'm not telling Tayler that I liked his yucky deer dog. Gross.

Saturday night we slept in Lindon, inside my parents house this time. Also with permission. Also we didn't break anything, not a lamp or anything. Also there was no booze involved AND we didn't invite everyone we know. We're responsible children and that's why my mom gave us permission to stay there without them. She'd probably never let Katy do that. :)

Sunday we spent the day with the Reilleys. More food, more games, more laughing, and a tiny bit of a sunburn. OK I can barely move my arms, but whatever.

We finally landed back at home last night and unpacked cleaned up and went to bed at a "reasonable hour" thank goodness.

That's when Baby Thomas decided my bladder was a soccer ball and went to town. It was another long night and this morning I feel like crap. I woke up puking. I'm too dizzy and tired to walk from the bed to the bathroom, so I crawl. I have zero brain ability and zero desire to do anything.

I'm tired, worn down, overwhelmed and incapable of functioning like a normal human being. All I want to do is lay in my bed and cry all day long, but instead I'm blogging because somehow I think then I can say I was sorta productive today.

Mostly I doubt my ability to handle things, to be a mom, and to make it through the remaining 155 days of this pregnancy. BUT a lot of people have lived through a LOT worse, and I really I shouldn't be whining. A year ago I would've KILLED to be this sick and pregnant. Today.....I'm not so sure I've got what it takes.

First camping trip of the season

Remember in high school when you wished every weekend that your parents would go out of town so you could have the house to yourself and throw a big party?  Well, for me that never happened. Not once. My parents are entirely too responsible.

However, now that we're all grown up, and they live home alone, they sometimes go to Seattle to visit my older brother.

Friday morning we decided to go camping that night.

Friday afternoon we called everyone we're related to and asked if they wanted to join us (only the Marshes and the young Reilleys were brave enough).

Friday afternoon (later) we called the campsite we planned to go to and found out it wasn't open yet.

Friday evening we drove to Lindon with Tato & Cami to eat dutch oven pizza with the Marshes. We pitched tents, played games, sat around, ate food, jumped on the trampoline, played on the swing. Then the Hunters came and we played night games until way past our bedtime.

Friday night we laid on the ground in our tent and pretended we were sleeping. All. Night. Long.

The Marshes were sissies and used the trampoline for a bed, I'm pretty sure they got a great night's sleep.

Saturday morning we woke up cranky and ate breakfast at Carl's Jr. before returning the Reilley's to their home.

We're claiming it was still pretty wilderness-y after all...want evidence?

See? a tent.

And a tree.

And Randy will swear on his life there's a squirrel somewhere in there....I can't see it....

*update* Nate can see the squirrel and pointed it out to me. Here's the proof.

and Nature!

And that was the first camping trip of the season. We are sissies.

Baby Egbert will be called.....

Now that we know it’s a boy, we’re pretty sure he’ll be named Thomas Adam Egbert. I say “pretty sure” because if one or both of us hates it after a month of referring to “da belly” as “Thomas” then we know it’s not going to last a lifetime and we’ll be back to the drawing board.  Here are my reasons for thinking we’ve chosen a GREAT name (so far).

Thomas is our Reilley-Dad’s middle name. And we really like the idea of naming our kids for people who we love and who are important to us. Also people with normal names. Not like Orvall, or LaMont.

Adam is Josh’s middle name and I like that Josh is our baby’s daddy. Also I like that his middle name is normal not like Blaze or Poindexter.

Thomas is a great name because it has great nicknames. Tommy, Tom, or Thomas. It doesn’t sound ugly any way you look at it. When you say it like he’s in trouble “Thomas! For the 10-thousandth time, put down that frog and come to dinner!” that fits and it doesn’t sound stupid when he’s brand new and NEVER does anything wrong “I love you Tommy-Wommy” (OK Tommy-Wommy is definitely NOT on the list of approved nicknames) and it fits in the Happy Birthday song “Happy Birthday, dear Thom-as” and it fits in that banana fanna song “Thomas mommus, bo bommus, banana fanna fo fonnus, me my, mo mommus, THOMAS!”. So far those are my criteria for names. Also normal initials that don't spell anything bad or stupid. TAE, that doesn't stand for anything bad or stupid does it?

As far as I can tell it’s the perfect name, and so far I really like it. Am I missing something about it that when he’s all grown up people are going to say “didn’t your mother love you, doesn’t she know your name means ____/sounds like _____/spells _____?” So, if I say that name, and you think “I can’t believe she’s actually considering that!” feel free to call me to repentance.  I may or may not listen but I will definitely read.

Some great things about having a boy first include:

*A mini-Josh! As if it gets any better than that.

*A big brother for any future kids.  My big brother once sat on my head until I memorized D&C 82:10 (which I did and have never forgotten). That was his version of “leading the family in scripture study” while my parents were gone. I’m convinced that every child needs a big brother.

*Trucks.

*Tuxes.

*Easy haircuts.

*Tiny little vests and ties.

*Maybe someone tall enough to reach the top cupboards when I’m old and shrunken.

*Father/Son campouts.

*Scout campouts.

Josh and I are thrilled that we are going to have a well-behaved, law-abiding, gentleman, kind, caring, capable, good at building stuff, intelligent, ADORABLE baby boy.

Don’t worry, I know it’s not all fun and games. And if I didn’t know, Katy (my sister) would tell me.  Not that she’s bitter…just that she feels it is her duty to warn me about being peed at.

Drumroll please....and the Baby Color is.....

Dr. Man: "Well this one is easy!"

Josh: "It's a boy!"

Amy: "Really? That's what we're looking at?"

Dr. Man: "Yep. This is definitely a boy" (Dr. Man then proceeded to label all of his parts in very clinical and embarrassing terms using the mouse as a pointer. Fortunately I have extra blood going through me so I can blush on cue.) 

My favorite conversation of the morning has to be this:

Amy: "We're havin' a boy! Dr. Man said 'this is definitely a boy'"

Josh: "I said it first."

Amy: "Yeah. Josh could TOTALLY tell, I couldn't though."

Papa Fugal: "Well, you can usually tell because boys have that thing hanging down."

Amy: "Thanks for that Daddy. I'm really glad we finally had this talk. Took ya long enough!"

Nana Fugal: "He's not talking about the uvula, OK?"

Love, Baby Egbert

Dear Bloggers,

Thanks for offering my mom 10 million hideous names and 6 nice ones. The 10 million made her more sure she hoped I was a boy, and the 6 made her know she wouldn't groan outloud if I was a girl.

Love,
Baby Egbert

PS Does anybody actually KNOW somebody named Drucella?

Girl Names

Nope, not an announcement. The big day is tomorrow. But I need help before that.

I'm nervous, I haven't really cared what gender our baby is because I will absolutely love it either way. Seriously I will.

But, I kinda hope it's a boy because I really can't think of any girl names that I like that are not yet taken. I know everybody is pregnant and you don't wanna share* your adorable girl names. I get that, I'm not so great with the sharing thing either. But seriously I need your help. Please share your cute girl names (that go with Egbert) because if we show up to that appointment tomorrow and he says "she's a girl!" and groan because I can't call her anything because all girl names are ugly....well the repercussions could be huge.

What if she winds up being a cross-dresser? What if she won't let me paint her toenails, or she does drugs, or rebels against her femininity her whole life? What if she doesn't wanna be a mom because she resents being a girl? What if she shaves her head bald and paints her face black and puts one of those icky spiky collars around her neck? What if her whole life is screwed up all because I can't think of a girl name and I groaned when I found out that's what she was?

Also I sorta believe that if I'm more prepared for a boy, it'll be a girl. And visa versa. So, if I could find like 10 girl names that go with Egbert that are cute that Josh and I both agree on, then it'll be a boy and we won't actually have to use any of them. So please. Help me.

*Disclaimer, while I reserve the right to steal any names offered here, just because you list it doesn't mean I'll like it. I'm REALLY picky. I mean REALLY picky. So, don't be afraid to list a bunch, or your favorite one that you've secretly been saving all these years. Chances are I won't use it anyway, there are like 10 million names out there, ya know?*

The “Real” Moms

I know you’re all thinking I’m a horrible person for not even mentioning my “real” moms in the previous post. You’re right, I am a horrible person, but it’s not my mom’s fault. Sometimes you just get stuck with bad kids (look at Cain and Alma!). But it’s really because these are women in my life who just can’t be lumped in with “the others”. They don’t belong in that category because they’re in a league all their own.

My Mom happens to be one of the most incredible people in the world. The funny thing is, I never even knew how strong she was until now. I think most people don’t realize how cool their moms are until they are grown up, but I was totally clueless. It’s amazing the things I don’t know about her, and even more amazing how much fun I’m having learning all of these things!

My mom went on a mission to South America. Back in the day when they washed their dishes and cooked with water gathered in “rain barrels”. Do they still do that? Gross. Then she came home and married my handsome handsome father, who (legend has it) had to give her $100 to go to Israel with his whole family before she’d say yes.

She now has 5 grown kids, 5 grown in-laws, and 8 and 3-halves grandkids. She’s still an amazing mom, and she gets up and does hard things all day every day.

She’s always been faithful and active in the church, she accept callings and serves willingly. She knows the difference between right and wrong, and she acts like it. She taught me that “there’s never a good reason to be mean to anybody” and she makes the world’s greatest rolls. She gardens, runs marathons, and cleans like moms used to (you know…back in the old days when dinosaurs roamed, ring was a pup, and she was a kid).  She humors us when we wanna roll around in the dirt, and doesn’t complain when we’re out on the lake and she’s cleaning up from or preparing a meal over a fire. Her fire food is every bit as good as her kitchen food. She plays the guitar, piano, and organ. She sings. She rocks babies to sleep. She snuggles with the best of ‘em, and even though she’s tiny, she can still hold her grown children on her lap and make all their owies go away. Believe me. I’ve done it.

The things I’m just learning about her amaze me. She went through a miscarriage while in Israel where nobody spoke English. She probably hasn’t had a decent night’s sleep in 30-whatever years because of entirely too many physical issues to name. I’m sure her body hurts, and her joints are sore (what with the arthritis, fibromyalgia, and just plain old age (ha ha ha)), but you’d never know it. Why? Because she’s on her hands and knees waxing the kitchen floor, pulling weeds, planting flowers, talking to grandkids, or praying.

Probably crying sometimes too, but I’ve never seen her break down. I’ve seen her cry, but it’s always with joy, from feeling spirit, or for someone else’s hurt. She doesn’t complain, she doesn’t whine, and you’ll probably never know about anything that bugs her. I don’t think she has pet peeves, and I don’t think she gets annoyed by people. My mom is wonder woman, and no matter how hard your mom tries, she’ll never be able to beat up my mom.

I’ve only had mothers-in-law for 3 years but I can’t begin to express my appreciation for these wonderful women.

Josh’s mom is one of those people that you know are going straight to the Celestial Kingdom because of their pure and simple goodness. There is no doubt in my mind that if I wanna see her after this life (and I do), I’d better shape up and be better. She knows the rules and she follows them. She is dedicated to the gospel and to her family. She loves kids (even those of us she didn’t raise) and she has perfect faith. I don’t think anybody ever questions her intentions because it’s clear that she does things out of love. She cares about people and always knows (and remembers) big events coming up. She’s interested in what’s going on in your life and she wants you to know she cares and she loves you. She’s strong and capable of anything. She fills so many roles it’s hard to imagine how she has time to do the “regular mom stuff” but somehow she always makes it happen. The faith with which she has lived is amazing to me.

Josh’s step-mom is that woman that you look at and wonder how she keeps going. From my perspective her life is exhausting, and she takes on jobs that most women don’t. She works graveyard shifts as a nurse, and I’m pretty sure she knows everything medical there is to know. She runs the household, cooks, cleans, gardens, and puts up her own Christmas lights. She stepped in to be an incredible mother to Josh when he was young. She is not the kind of woman who asks for help, probably because she can do everything by herself. She is strong and knows how to stand up for herself and I truly think there isn’t anything she can’t do.

Not only are they incredible mother’s to me now, but they raised Josh and taught him how to be the man he is. They taught him respect and caring, they taught him how to work and how to play. I’m pretty sure they taught him about PMS, but it’s not the kind of thing you truly understand until you’ve married to it….they tried though. J I’m married to an incredible man, and lucky enough to have mothers-in-law who managed to give him all of their goodness and keep plenty of it for themselves too.

The bottom line is, no matter how old I get, no matter where I am, no matter who I’m with or what I’m doing. I have mommies who love me and really, what else matters?

Let’s talk about moms.

Growing up Mother’s Day was not only about my incredibly-super-fantastic-amazing-super-mom but about ALL of the women who helped raise me. All of the women I looked to when I needed advice. And ALL of the women who loved me unconditionally. There are a lot of people who fit into those categories (seriously, a lot) and even though I haven’t seen many of them for years I still think of them every year on Mother’s Day.

Since I practically lived at Carly’s house, I saw her mom as much as I saw my own. Not once did she yell or scream. Not once did she kick us out (and I’m sure she wanted to) and more than once she planned cool stuff for us to do. More than anything though, she let us be stupid teenagers and didn’t hate us for it. It may not sound like a big deal, but to me it was. Carly’s Grandma falls in this same category. Also she taught me that there’s no point in leaving stuff in the fridge for more than 3 days because nobody wants it after that anyway and it’s easier to just throw it away before its growing things. I’m pretty sure she still has the cleanest fridge I’ve ever seen.


Other neighborhood moms I have to include:
Heather’s mom who taught me how to swear (a talent I probably wouldn't have learned anywhere else) starting with the first time I ever walked through their door.
Megan’s mom who does it all. I really can’t think of one single ‘mom-role’ that she doesn’t fill. She's the kind of woman all the other moms hate - not because she's hateable....she's not....just because nobody can keep up with her.
Platt’s mom who is the queen of service, bettering yourself, and working hard.
Andrea who let me play mom to her kids….I look at kids the age I was and admire her for her faith in me. (yikes!) I truly can’t believe she trusted me with her kids.
Of course there were others, but we'll stop here.

My “work moms” are some of the most incredible women I’ve ever known. Ever. I was lucky enough to land a SWEET job at USDC in high school and stay for 2 years. The ladies I worked with were so good to me it’s ridiculous. They helped me make decisions. They taught me how to grow up. They loved me and celebrated with me when I decided to do something good. These women made me feel like a grown-up and a valued member of “the team”. I learned all about business and real life in that office. My 18-year-old brain could barely stand the thought of leaving there, ever. Even to go to more school. Mostly because I loved them so much. But of course they wouldn’t let me “settle” there because they thought I could do and become more. They were right, but I’d still like to hang out there for 4 hours a day. Also they taught me how to spell “development” and laughed with me when we saw that the receipts we’d been using for umpteen years said “devleopement” on them. I still can’t spell development without thinking “dev-lee-ope-ment”.


Now that I'm a grown up working with grown ups, I don't think of my co-workers as my own moms, but as my friends. Still Aundrea and Karleen are some of the best examples of motherhood a girl could ask for. I can't begin to list the things they've taught me, mostly by showing me how they are with their kids. They're kind enough to share their personal experiences and teach me from their experiences. I'm thrilled that Baby Egbert will get to know these women as adoptive moms (grandmas if they were old enough...they're not....no matter what Spencer says about looking "motherly" or how many grandkids they already have).

My Young Women leaders (Reeves, Gurney, Joy Lee, Bowman and a million others) were amazing. Mostly I think of Girl’s Camp when I think of them, and WOW did they put up with a lot. But, they “roughed it” with us and they attempted to help us have better attitudes. They taught me about trenching and being prepared. They taught me about drying out sleeping bags in the morning because I hadn’t trenched as I was taught. They taught me about responsibility and setting a good example (I didn’t act on that until MUCH later in my life…but I hope they know they taught it to me). These were women of faith and women of courage and I’m alarmed at the things they went through with me & my incredibly obnoxious group of friends (13^th ward anybody?).  Probably because most of them were moms of the other girls and couldn’t very well disown their own children. They also taught us how to work, serve and obey our leaders (even though we whined about it the whole time).

When I turned 18 and had to go to Relief Society (kindof against my will) there was a small group of women who made me feel more welcome than I could have dreamed. Dianna Otterstrom always said hi to me and asked how I was doing somehow she knew what was going on in my life (it was a mystery then, kinda like how the tooth-ferry knew when I lost a tooth….something makes me think the same source kept both people filled in….) She was also a “cool mom” and I’m pretty sure she was in YW at one point so I felt like I belonged wherever she was. It just so happened that she went to RS. Sister Maughn is the perfect example of poise and lady-like-ness, but not in a holier-than-thou snooty way. You still feel totally comfortable with her. She’s like the queen of England without the stress....or the tea.

I could go on all day, but I’m pretty sure you’ve given up reading by now. The examples of good moms in my life seems to never end. I’m continually surrounded by incredible women, some who have given birth, some who haven’t. Some who currently care for kids full time, some who don’t. No matter their situation, they’ve taught me the most important things about being a mom, and for that I am incredibly thankful. 

Breakfast of champions

Because apparently scarfing a bowl of Special K and smashing your gag reflex with a toothbrush repeatedly doesn't mix well with pregnancy.

Eh well, I'm here.

I feel...

I feel.....

• Happy for a beautiful spring day. I truly believe that the current 62 degrees it is outside is PERFECT.
• Thankful for my husband.
• Glad to have been married in the temple.
• Anxious about the upcoming temperature hike.
• Pressure to be EVERYWHERE this weekend. (I'm becoming a Holiday hater....but that's a whole other post....)
• Like chopping off all my hair and starting over.
• Excited for my Scentsy stuff. (Thanks Jess!)
• Lonely - is anybody NOT on vacation today? Anybody?
• Loved by my family.
• THRILLED for Misty & Ryan (my baby won't be the only Baby Egbert!)
• Nervous about major decisions.
• Ready for summer camping season to start.
• Baby Egbert swimmin' around - at about 4:30 every day. It's our special bonding time.
• Ready for a new wardrobe.
• Surprised that the blue votes are currently more than pink!
• Not as filthy rich as the people around me.
• WAY filthier rich than the people far from me.
• Irritated by people's inability to CLOCK IN when you're here and CLOCK OUT when you leave. (Really. It's not rocket science.)
• Happy to have pregnancy buddies, Nancy (closest to my due date), Katy (closest to my DNA), Wendy (closest to my brother) AND Misty (closest to my crazy-in-law life). Anytime ANYTHING happens in this pregnancy, someone else just went through it, or is about to. That's a nice feeling.
• Grateful for priesthood leaders. Especially my totally awesome bishopric.
• Content with life in general.
• The clock ticking slower than my heartbeat....is that a bad thing?

Free Stuff

Since I don't wanna share my lopsidedness with the whole world I'm working really hard on winning a free one of these. Also because it's cute, and I need to work on my cute factor. Thanks Nancy, for the tip.

Do you think I could "wear" it on a regular basis and not have to buy as many shirts?

If you want to win one too, you can enter, I guess. But the less people who enter, the better my chances are.....so.....you know, I'm not going to tell you to run over and enter the contest now. I'm also not going to tell you that I've been putting off posting it on my blog so you wouldn't have as much time to enter. :)

Shameless, I know.

But I will tell you (when I win) how much I love this thing, and tell you to buy one from her. I'm all for supporting the business, just not sharing my opportunity to win it for free.

Lopsided

It's not like I've been perfectly proportioned my whole life, but until yesterday, I've never looked in the mirror and been able to SEE, actually physically see, one side of me bigger than the other.

Nobody told me that I'd pee my pants every time I puked, coughed or sneezed. And nobody bothered to mention that my boobs were gonna grow at different rates.

Josh laughed at me when I told him, and said "yep. they're different."

Seriously? I get that my body is gonna change, but can't it change on BOTH sides? Come on.

Things I can reach

I have to stand up and move about every hour. Really, I've started making excuses. Pretending I meant to print something so I can walk to the printer and back with nothing in my hands, needing more ice, stocking office supplies, etc.

Just now I realized that there are a lot of things within arm's reach that I don't even have to move for. Believe it or not, most of these things are relatively entertaining....

my cell phone

stapler

tape dispenser

2 giant cups of water (one of ice, one of ice water)

an orange

my debit card/ID badge

the "hold up the papers" thing that I like to pinch my fingers with

my "knocking wood"
(I asked the cabinet guys for a "scrap of wood" so that when I "knock on wood" I wouldn't have to knock on laminate anymore. They brought me this beautiful polished piece of mahogany complete with felt feet.)

my glasses

a very lovely picture of me and handsome hubby

a snowman

pen and paper

name plate

phone

kleenex

heart paperclip from Tahnee (she loves me you know...)

there were 2 grimy ziplock bags, but i just threw them away cuz they were grossing me out.

my radio
(Aundrea and I might be allowed to play marco polo now that she has a mobile one instead of a big "base radio". I think I'd win if we played I Spy....I'm not so sure about marco polo.)

Sticky notes & post it flags in every size and 2 colors (respectively)

Really I should be able to keep myself entertained with all that stuff, right?

So why am I SOOO BORED?!?!?!?!

Priorities

One of the hardest things in life for me is figuring out which good things to do at which times.

Like tonight. 

Should I watch The Biggest Loser Finale? Or American Idol?

Make dinner? Or go on a walk?

Dishes? Or Laundry?

Nap? Or read about parenting and giving birth?

Ideally I wouldn't be so drained, tired, and overwhelmed and I could choose all of those things in one night. Ideally I’d feel like waking up before noon. Ideally we'd be independently wealthy and throwing money out of our helicopter on our way to kayak (in our own kayak...) in Alaska and it wouldn't be irresponsible or unreasonable. Ideally I’d weigh 105 pounds and never eat chocolate. But sometimes you sleep till noon, have a Cadbury mini egg for breakfast, show up at work in Utah in a regular old car without giving anybody as much as a dime, and weigh more than you want. That’s called being a grownup.

So, tonight I have some choices to make, but that’s nothing compared to the other choices I have. Especially when it comes to parenting.

I have a theory that mom’s only have a certain amount of energy. Rather than labeling with a number (which would be wrong anyway) we’ll just use percentages. I have 100% of my energy. How I spend it is up to me. 

Right now the split seems to be 50% sleeping 40% eating 5% puking and 5% blogging about the sleeping, eating, and puking.

When the baby is born, I’m betting it switches to 50% diapers, 40% cuddling, oohing and ahhing, 5% eating, and 5% sleeping.

But eventually I’ll have to get up, take a shower, and act like a mom. That’s when the choices really get hard. There are so many really great practices, theories, and things to teach your kids. And a lot of them are best if you start right away. So, how am I supposed to know what’s most important?

I hope we do the babywise (or something similar) thing so our child WE can sleep through the night.

I’m really interested in Elimination Communication, because I’d love to not be changing diapers my whole life.

I’d like to spend plenty of time signing and reading with my child.

I hope I’ll be better about meal planning and cleaning on a regular basis.

I should be offering choices a la Parenting With Love & Logic.

Teaching my kid to eat good food, make good choices, and of course read, write, and rithmetic are important.

I want to have plenty of time for playing and bonding.

Learning to interact with other kids and sharing is a must (although I don’t have a clue how to teach a child that).

What about the actual birth? Natural or drugs? hypno? water? bradley? In those precious first few moments of Baby Egbert's life, how do I make sure that Baby is getting everything Baby needs?

And that's just the beginning of the list of things I know about, and there are 10 million more that I have no idea about.

The problem is every one of these things take a lot of time, dedication, and making sure that you take some action every time something happens. i.e. putting the child in the crib when sleeping. Child on the toilet when taking care of business, etc.

The bottom line is, I only have 100% of my energy, and 100% of my time each day. So, how do I pick which of all these good things are most important and how do I pick what really doesn’t matter that much to me? 

What did you pick and why? What do you wish you'd picked? What am I completely forgetting about? How much time/energy do which things really take? How much time/energy do I really have? 

What color is our baby?

People always wanna know, myself included, what gender the baby will be. When I say _____ more weeks and we'll know, they say "do you have a guess?" and then I feel stupid because I don't really know how people know stuff like that.

If I hadn't felt the baby, heard the heartbeat, seen the ultrasound(s), and peed on the stick myself I wouldn't really know I was even pregnant. How am I supposed to know the gender of this thing? Do boys and girls act different when they're 3 inches long? Do they feel different inside you? Can you really tell?

In short, I have NO idea what gender our baby will be. No clue whatsoever.

I kinda want a boy, partly because I like more boy names than girl. I kinda want a girl because Josh gets whooped over little girls and pink things are cuter than blue. I kinda hope it's a boy so any future girls will have a protective older brother. I kinda hope it's a girl because then she can be a princess instead of a Monster. And people will say she's beautiful. And I can put a bow on her head. I kinda hope it's a boy because prom and weddings will be cheaper, plus...you know....mood swings. Also I kinda like boys better, and together we might have a better chance at beating Josh at a Nintendo game sometime. Also I've always wanted to do the pine-wood derby thing.

There are pros and cons to both and the truth is I'm so thrilled that a human is growing inside me, that I don't really care what color it is. So, here's the question of the day. What color do YOU think my baby is? Vote on the Right.

Bring on the diapers!

No. Not for me.

Josh and I both think it's a good idea to start buying boring stuff like diapers early on so we have plenty on hand and don't get depressed when we have to buy 20,000 of them in 1 week.

However, I have it my head that there's so much fun stuff to buy and I wanna buy something fun first. Do I really want to say the first baby item I ever bought was a jumbo pack of diapers at the grocery store? No.

So, I've banned us from buying boring things until we have something fun for the baby.

On Wednesday we went to Go Bananas because my sister-in-law said they just got a bunch of baby stuff in.

She was right.

We got a pack 'n play, a swing, a bath, and a changing pad ALL for $85. I feel good about that, so if you got a better deal don't tell me about it.

Now that we got some fun stuff the baby shopping can begin. Bring on the diapers.

Incidentally, how many diapers do I need? If I buy a pack of diapers every time I go to the grocery store for the next 6 months....am I gonna be sorry? How many of which sizes should I start stocking up on?

Feeling the baby

You know how people can describe what it's like to feel a baby moving inside you and you always think "weird" or "cool" or "huh...."? I'm not even going to TRY to describe it, because I can't do it justice. But that has to be the coolest thing in the whole wide world.

I was sitting at work, writing this post about how I can't "feel" my baby moving around, when out of nowhere Baby Egbert starts swimmin' around in there! I gasped and "oh my gosh!"ed at Aundrea and Karleen, and told them I just felt the baby move. Aundrea didn't believe me, but Karleen backed me up. I cried. They didn't make fun of me. In fact I think they both cried too.

The weird thing was not knowing what to do. Shouldn't something happen now? I didn't dare move because I didn't want it to stop. I looked down at my stomach to watch, but of course didn't see anything. I closed my eyes to try to feel it better, turned off my music and listened. Not that there's anything to hear. Should I say something? Should I do something? I put my hand on my stomach and thought "I love you Baby! Thanks for growing in there." I asked Aundrea and Karleen what I was supposed to do. They laughed with me. I cried some more. And wished there was a way to share that feeling with Josh.

How could he not know what it's like? How can he understand how cool this is? How can he be missing out on something SO HUGE! How do I describe it to him? How to do explain it? How do I involve him in this moment of bonding with Baby?

He called within 10 minutes to tell me he was on his way to pick me up. I told him I just felt the Baby move. He said "that alien in you is moving?"

I told him our baby is NOT A MONSTER!!!! And then he laughed at me. Said "cool." like it was nothing and asked when I'd be ready to go home.

Fortunately Aundrea and Karleen cried with me even though Josh didn't. I love working with them. Do you think they'll fight for custody?

Beautiful Girl

A week and a half until we find out what color our baby is. That's not what this post is about.

4 weeks ago my boss literally ran out of his weekly meeting to see his first granddaughter who was just being born.

Yesterday his beautiful daughter brought his beautiful granddaughter in to the office to show off. The newest baby I've held (or seen) since finding out we were pregnant is probably my nephew Logan. He is almost a year old now....doesn't really count as "brand new" anymore in my mind. He was it until yesterday, when Candace was kind enough to let me hold Ellie who is only 4 weeks old.

She is so beautiful, so perfect, so tiny, so soft, and so incredible.

Ellie was totally calm when her grandpa handed her to me, and she let me just hold her and look at her for like 15 minutes. I can't believe I'm going to have one of those. I can't believe that the thing in my tummy is going to look like that tiny little person. I can't believe how huge her blue eyes were, or how tiny her little fingers were. I can't believe how enthralled with her I was. Normally when I'm holding someone else's baby (especially someone I don't know) I get nervous and awkward, but I really didn't want to give this girl back! I didn't want to share, even with Mark. Fortunately (for them) the phone rang and I had to answer it and return this beautiful child to her grandpa.

She looked enormous in her carseat. But as soon as Mark took her out and put her on his shoulder she shrunk to roughly half her size. She was so little. And you couldn't wipe the grin off that man's face. He is so in love with that little one, and who can blame him?

I can't wait to meet this little one I've already fallen in love with.