Rejected

The day we moved out of our home in North Salt Lake I had a tiny breakdown (or 20) because I can't stand to leave Salt Lake. Mostly because of our friends there. Also because I love Salt Lake. It has been my home since I grew up and moved out. And it is the only home my boys know. And I love it there.

I also love Utah County. It's beautiful and filled with my family and familiar places from my childhood. But......so far I mostly just want to go home. And it would appear that Utah County wants me to go home too.

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I hate the freeway here, everything is under construction and you have to know 10 miles ahead of time which lane you want to be in to go the right way. Not only can you not get OFF the freeway and headed the right direction without inside knowledge, but you can't avoid getting ON the freeway if you're anywhere near it.

I am not a good driver and I don't love driving. Especially in places that I'm not familiar with. So I had a tiny "Utah County hates me" moment after being forced onto and not being able to get off the freeway when the last thing I had was time for a tour of I-15 construction.

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Then our first night here John (who has been mildly sick for like 2 weeks) woke up with a raging fever and a very difficult time breathing and I spent most of the first night here in the ER. Which is where I learned that we weren't giving him anywhere near enough drugs to control the fever and that everything else was totally fine with him. "He's perfect" the Dr. told me, then we chatted it up about triathlons. Most expensive tylenol instructions ever. The good news is, of course, that he's perfect.

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I've been back and forth between Salt Lake and my parents' house AT LEAST once a day since we left, for one thing or another.

Somehow in Davis County everything is better. I went to the court house to pay a speeding ticket far more than the 14 days later. You don't get tickets all the time? You didn't know you have to pay it between 5 and 14 days after getting it? Well, aren't you glad you came here today to learn something new? I beat the mail man by what couldn't have been more than a few minutes. Beating the mailman there saved me a late fee and a court appearance explaining my flakiness to the Judge. Davis County loves me.

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Furthering the love, the people adding some duct work to my house magically have openings "right now" to take care of everything I need before our renters move in.

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But in Utah County the free storage unit costs me money, the freeway won't let me off, nobody wants us to be their tenants and my computer suddenly forgets how to function.

What's that thing about being rejected like a bad organ transplant? That's what I am. A bad organ transplant.

I honestly feel like there is a place for us here - I just haven't found it yet. And the looking is wearing me down.

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The good (and non-whiny) news is:
That we are surrounded by friends and family who are meeting our every need.
No matter how much I joke about it we aren't actually homeless.
My boys love being here. All of them. Josh is just 10 minutes away from the new job, Tommy has a trampoline and swingset, John has doting grandparents and we all have a hot meal every night. What's not to love?