Tuesday, February 8, 2011

What Keeps Me Up At Night

When I was pregnant with Tommy I became certain that I needed to own a bathrobe.

Mostly it was because at 2am I'd lay awake in bed thinking "If the house caught fire right now, I'd barely have time to roll out of bed and waddle down the stairs before I burned to death. There would be no time to put clothes on, and I don't know any of my neighbors well enough to knock on their door in my underwear at 2am and ask them to clothe the whale that I am.............................(this isn't true anymore, I have lots of whale-clothing neighbors now)
And if the house catches on fire NOW (5 minutes later) I'm going to have to tell the story in church where I ignored the promptings of the Spirit to get up and put my pajamas on so I wouldn't have to wander the streets in my underwear. That's gonna be embarrassing. Maybe I should just lay here and burn instead."

So I bought a bathrobe. Because somehow that seemed to solve my problem. And now I wear my bathrobe pretty much all day long.

And now I lay awake at night thinking "Do people put their bathrobes by their beds in case the house catches on fire?" So, I'm asking you. What do people do when their homes catch fire in the middle of the night? And where do you keep your bathrobe?

Also, what keeps you up at night?


  1. Funny post!

    I keep my bathrobe on a hook on the bathroom door.

    What keeps me up at night is definitely design. I start designing things in my head and I can go at it for hours. Sometimes it's a project I'm working on but mostly it's just someone's house that I think needs a revamp. I know that's weird and I probably shouldn't admit it but I totally do that when I go to people's houses. They're saying, "So I was at..." and I'm thinking, "You really ought to move that chair to the other side of the room" while nodding my head.

    I think I just overshared, sorry

  2. We keep our bathrobes on the back of the bathroom door. Where did you get your bathrobe? Does it cover past your knees? I can't find a good bathrobe anywhere.

  3. Tons of things keep me up at night. I have super anxiety, I think! One time I had a dream that Brian had recently been turned into a vampire. We got into an elevator and I knew he was going to kill us. (me and the girls). I was up half the night because I couldn't find a way to save us from that situation. How do you save yourself from your husband vampire when stuck in an elevator with him?? I have many fears, though they usually are not vampires! I don't even own a bathrobe! Terrible! I always sleep in PJs for the exact reasons you are talking about. Brian does not and I often wonder what he will do if our house catches on fire.

  4. i like that you admit to not wearing actual pajamas in bed. we don't wear pajamas in bed either- too hot and you'd get too twisted up like that.

    kinda funny story...last fall i nearly locked myself out of the house in my underwear- luckily i just happened to throw on some sweats! i was home alone and probably would have had to sit outside in the backyard while my children screamed and cried for me inside all day long because i didn't have my phone on me either.

    lastly, what keeps me up at night is thinking about all the dumb and embarrassing things i say to people all the time.

  5. Last night what kept me up was the doofus licking herself. All. night. long.

    Anybody want a dog?

    You'll be shocked to learn that I sleep in PJ's because I'm too cold without them. There was a family in our ward when I was a child who had a fire, and Dad was just in his G's. Nobody judged him--just clothed him.

  6. Last night I couldn't sleep because the second I closed my eyes I realized we'd been overcharged at Happy Sumo a few hours before. So I played the pregnancy card and forced Reece to get out of bed and find the receipt, just so I could validate my theory. And then I stayed up even later worrying about whether or not they'd give us our $3.50 back.

    I'm weird.

    Also, I too wear my robe around all day, because robes are divine.

  7. Kristina - I think there's no such thing as oversharing. :)

    Wendy - I have a LOONG one that I love. I got it at Shopko for like $20 and I see them at Costco for about that too. I LOVE it!

    Carrie - I think we've established that I'm as paranoid as you are. I hate elevators for that reason, no escape!

    Ashlie - I hope you'd come knock on my door if you were stranded outside in your underwear. I've give you clothes and I wouldn't judge you, I promise!

    Aundrea - Stupid dog.

    Jess - Did you get your money back? If not I think I might not sleep tonight. Gee thanks.

  8. LOL, I have the exact same worry! I always end up putting PJs on b/c I worry to much about getting caught clothesless during a disaster by my neighbors, or heaven forbid, a newscamera. Scott thinks I'm psycho. Glad to know I'm not the only one. ;) I think I need to buy a robe...

  9. Okay this post and all of the comments just made me laugh.

    The one who redecorates everyone's houses can come over and tell me what she comes up.

    I wear PJ's. John bought me a robe probably hoping I wouldn't, but I get cold.

    Right now, the baby keeps me up. But, I don't worry about fires. My dad worried about fires and always unplugged the toaster before bed. I thought that was weird, so I worry that I might be worrying too much :).

  10. you were actually the first person i thought to go to for help when i was locked out (i rang your doorbell but you didn't answer).

    so, just so that you don't think i'm a total weirdo this is exactly what happened:
    i hadn't gotten dressed yet for the day and i had to put something in the backyard- just outside the door. i was going to do a real quick throw out the door but then decided to put on some sweats luckily. when i stepped out the backdoor, i shut the door behind me and the wood fell into place locking me out...
    yay fun.

    anyway, sorry for the long comments, i just worried that maybe you thought i was weird and actually entertained the idea of going outside in only undies. :P

  11. You all are so funny! I sleep in PJ's because I don't want to be stranded in my undies! I also have to have a phone at my bedside. I always worry that I wouldn't be able to call 911 if someone broke into my house because my phone would be downstairs with the bad guys! And actually now that I'm writing this I'm now worried that my fire extinguisher is downstairs. Maybe I should put that under my bed :)

  12. The only thing that keeps me up at night is when my closet door is left open. I'm still afraid of monsters apparently, and I close every closet (including my children's and the empty rooms) before bed. If I don't, I can't sleep until I get up and do it. I also sleep in pj's cause I'm always cold.

    Ashlie, how did you get back in your house?

  13. I always sleep in PJ's...otherwise this would keep me up all night...and now I realized that we totally need a fire extinguisher for upstairs! This will probably keep me up until that problem is solved....

  14. emily,
    ran over to linda's to use her phone and call my husband.

    my children were inside taking naps. thank heavens they weren't running around on the lose without supervision.

  15. *loose.

    sorry for all the comments amy.

  16. I'm so bummed I didn't answer and rescue you! But I'm glad that Linda did. Also glad they were napping - lucky mom.

    Also, the conversations in comments are the best part of blogging. No apology necessary.


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