Friday, August 7, 2009

Enough?

Do you think the widow ever thought her mite wasn't enough? 
The rest of us look at her as a woman of great faith, as someone who gave all she had and couldn't possibly have given anything more meaningful. But, do you think she ever stood back, looked at what she'd given and thought "I just don't have enough."
Some days I feel like "giving all I have" falls short. I know it's all I have, and I know that the receiver appreciates the effort, but all too often the result is.....well.....just not quite enough.
I wish my skills, my talents, and my abilities were a little more far-reaching so that I could give the things I really want to give. 
I hate feeling like I've tried my hardest and done my best, then standing back to look at my work and tilting my head to the side, squinting, and still not being satisfied with what I've done. Part of me thinks "if I just try a little harder or work on it a little longer maybe it will come out right" but another part - a huge part - thinks "That's it. That's all you have and all you can do. If it isn't enough, it isn't enough."
I know my best is appreciated. I even know my best is good enough in some situations. I'm even pretty sure other people don't look at me and wish my best was more...but today, I wish my best was more.
Wanna know the stupid thing? All of this is because of our 2nd bedroom. It won't be a nursery at all, but it isn't quite a massage room, and certainly isn't an office. In the qualified and capable hands of someone else, it could probably function as all 3 of those things, but I just don't have enough.

3 comments:

  1. "Enough is as good as a feast." -Mary Poppins

    (It's applicable because the title of this post is "Enough".)

    And anywayz, baby Thomas probably wants to sleep in your room until he's like 6 months old.

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  2. Oh, a challenge. I'll bet you could come up with a cute way to make it all 3. Make a desk/diaper changing station, slide the massage table under the crib, and voila! All 3. I love oversimplifying things. But seriously, good luck with that.

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  3. I say you sign up for one of those super cool shows on TLC or HGTV and let them think of how to solve this dilema. :)

    You are so much better than me. You worry about saying 'enough'... I think sometimes I give up too easily because things get too much.

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