Monday, January 16, 2012

Meditation: Part 2(ish)

Last week I tried meditating again.

I thought that if I got a little more comfortable, and had finished all the house stuff and the boys were down before I started I'd be wildly successful.

The problem came when I had cleaned the entire house, caught up on my work, put all 3 of my boys in bed and sat alone in a dark room with my eyes closed.

I looked at the clock at 11:43pm. And when I woke up it was 2:45am. I'd love to count this as a 3 hour session and say I rock at meditation....but the truth is I'm certain I was entirely unconscious by 11:44pm.

So this week I figured I needed help.

So I googled guided meditation and picked the first youtube video more than 12 minutes long. Since Josh thinks I need to calm down, I picked the anti-anxiety version.

I ignored the dishes in the sink and the dirty laundry on the floor. I pretended my work was done and my house was organized and I turned on the video.

Things were going fine until the voice told me we had walked up a grassy hill and that I should (mentally) look for a place to lie down.

As I looked around the beautifully grassy knoll for an appropriate place to lie down, my heart rate picked up, I looked and looked and looked and all of the spots had dirt-patches in them. The grass wasn't even, and there were dandelions and gopher bumps in the ground. In my head I was dressed in something pretty and I wasn't about to lay in the dirt.

Suddenly the voice was telling me I was doing a great job and that now that we were on the beach I should hear the waves crashing and the feel the light breeze on my face.

I'm not sure what else happened (or was supposed to happen) on that hill, but I kept my eyes closed through the entire session - that counts, right?


  1. Haha!!! You asked what I think about when I'm not thinking about running.... When I was really good at it, it got to the point where I was talking to the Lord. It was my meditation time. My mind didn't think about the miles or what my legs were doing or feeling, it was busy talking to the Lord and thinking about what I needed to do to be a better person. I did a 8 mile run once where I don't even remember the run because I was so into my thoughts.

    When I get to that point right now where I just want to quit I tell myself that I'm not a quitter and I don't want to cut myself short. I need to stop cheating myself. I find a spot ahead of me and say "I'll run to there." and while I'm running to there I try to get my mind off of running, so I run past that point without even thinking about it. It's not easy, but it's worth it in the end.

    You'll figure out meditation. You've just got to figure out a way that works for you. I could never just sit there quietly, but I can run. :) Good luck!

  2. I have these podcasts on my phone that come from
    If you can hear through the Aussie accent they are good.


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